40 days and 40 nights

Today is The first day of Lent.  I've decided to give up a few things but I am not going to advertise them. First, I think of the things I try to give up during Lent like new years resolutions, you say your gonna do it just cuz you feel like you gotta say your gonna do it but you know deep down your gonna get a week in and say PFFFFFFT. Second, this year I am working on not telling "man" what I want to accomplish, but telling God, and having a conversation with Him about where my life is going and what I can do different and better. My walk is my own, my cross is my own and I am in charge of it. Third,This year I am picking some intensely personal things to give up. Last night as I lay in bed, I thought of a couple of conversations I had with Janet and Reana. It brought to mind all the intense pressure I've been under and I thought this year for Lent, this Lapsed Catholic is gonna probably still be lapsed (for a person who has issues with organized religion i sure retain a lot of residue of them lol) is gonna do two things...stop feeling bad for forgetting not to eat meat on Fridays and give up some of the things that are putting needless insurmountable amounts of pressure on her being.
These things may include but aren't limited to people,  jobs, habits, and drama.
If I get to good friday this year and even one of those things is gone and the tension in my life is eased, I will have a lot to thank God and myself for.
God for being my strength and my comfort  and for bringing amazing people into my life as a physical reminder of His presence.
And me for taking charge of my life and answering the call.

Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

 But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face;

 That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.

Matthew 6:16-18

King James Version (KJV)